The domain registration for outnotes.com is due next month and I have to pay for the web hosting for the site, and I am totally broke. Please help keep Out Notes alive by donating here.
We don’t need much money to keep things going. The goal is only $300, which will cover the domain registration and the next year of web hosting. I’ll update this post with progress towards that goal. Thanks!
Just quick note on why some notes end up on the blog in the letters section and the rest go to the home page. So, the scoop is that the site was created with the idea that it would be a place for letters people had written to friends or family as a way of coming out. In the meantime we have also received a lot of other inspirational and heart warming letters and stories of other formats. We would like to keep the main notes section true to the original idea; but there is always room on the site whatever else you want to send our way! As always, feedback is appreciated on this stance as it also our intention that this be a community driven site.
Welcome to BiPass. My thoughts, my feelings, and occasionally my rants. I’m 22, Bisexual, and hopelessly in love, with a man; yep a wonderful, smart, handsome man. I have been with this man for 8 years, I couldn’t be happier. This relationship has created an interesting path for my life. I have always sensed that I was attracted to women, and yet I have been attracted to men also. I seem to have looked at them both equally in a sexual way. I have, however, always dated men; and I intend to marry and spend my life with a man. I just get along better with men. I came out to my boyfriend about 6 years ago. I am lucky that I have a secure and loving boyfriend. It wasn’t easy to tell. I had denied the way that I was for a long time, and even thinking about telling him was daunting. But I did tell him and he was amazing: not only was he ok, he was supportive, and communicative, without judgment. He loves me.
That is why I simply cannot understand what is going on in our country at the moment. Most people spend a life time trying to find what I have with him. Yet there are people that are trying to deny others with love like mine the right to express and share their love and lives. There aren’t many people who know I am bisexual; so nobody questions the validity or strength of my relationship with my boyfriend…we are being pushed to marry and procreate as we speak. I wonder if that would change if people knew I have sex with girls. I wonder if it would change if they knew my boyfriend knew about it and supported it and has encouraged my to truly be myself. Saying that a loving, healthy, committed relationship is a travesty to the fine institution of marriage based on the couples sexuality is a crock . It is a fallacy of the worst kind. Who are we to judge someone else’s relationship? Who are we to say who can be bonded in love, finance and law? Yet there are quite a few people in this country who seem to think GLBT marriage will disturb or destroy the sanctity of marriage. Well I will ask this: What do an over 50% divorce rate, prenups, and The Bachelor do for the sanctity of marriage? How will equal rights for all people and the ability to be beholden and bonded to the person you love harm the sanctity of marriage beyond was is already being done? Beyond that, how does the relationship of strangers effect the strength and love of your relationship? Do these people have answers? Please, give me answers. Give me an answer that justifies this denial. No? Couldn’t come up with one? Didn’t think so.
~Liv
OutNotes is thrilled to introduce Liv, our first columnist. I’ll let her introduce herself futher, but her column will be titled BiPass and will include a variety of topics with a focus on bisexuality.
We have received a couple other inquiries from folks interested in contributing to OutNotes News, but there is still room so speak up if you are interested.
I plan to do some advertising to get OutNotes going again starting in January 2006. In the meantime I am on the hunt for some folks to contribute to OutNotes News (a.k.a. the blog you are currently reading). I would like to recruit 2+ people to contribute 2-20 postings per week on anything related to OutNotes. This could include any GLBT information or news, or anything else that might interest OutNotes visitors. No prior experience is required. If you are interested or have any questions use the contact form. I want to get a couple people going before the advertising starts so that new visitors see an active news section. So, if you stay up to date on GLBT news, events, laws, and/or information, or just want to share your thoughts with an open-minded audience this is a good opportunity to express yourself and inform your community.
Update 10/28: Maybe the bar should be lowered slightly…I’m willing to give you a login and provide technical support if you can contribute at least one entry per month, although I would still prefer 1+ per week. We may have our first columnist ready to start soon, a bisexual 20-something woman from California…I’ll keep you updated.
If you would like your own blog, like this one, check out OutNotes’ new blog section!
OutNotes needs to raise $60 to cover the cost of hosting and press releases, so get over to the donate page and do what you can to help out.
Hi. I was taking a look at your website, and I was hoping that you could add our organization as a link on your site. We’re working hard to increase our visibility in the community, and could use your help in letting people know about our services.
The Gay & Lesbian National Hotline (website: www.glnh.org) is the only non-profit and nationwide toll-free hotline that provides free and confidential telephone peer-counseling and local resource information for gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender and questioning people of all ages.
We have the largest resource database of its kind in the world, with over 18,000 local listings for cities and towns all across the United States. Included in that list are youth groups, support and social organizations, gay-friendly religious groups, sports groups, doctors, lawyers, counselors, places to go out at night and much more.
We also provide direct-service peer-counseling over the telephone if someone is going through a difficult time and needs someone to talk to.
Our services are completely free and totally confidential.
Our website is www.glnh.org and our toll-free telephone number is 1-888-THE-GLNH.
Thanks for your help in letting our community know about our services. If you have any question, please feel free to contact me by reply email.
With Pride,
Brad Becker
Executive Director
Gay & Lesbian National Hotline
Here is another link suggestion, the site is in Portuguese: E-jovem. You can get a rough idea of what the site says with Google’s translation.
Here is another letter we received:
12 years ago I turned away from God.
Yet I knew that ignoring him/her wasn’t going to help.
I guess with such complicated things as religion, it was okay to turn away.
Especially from places where it’s forbidden.So I asked God one night, “Give me a sign!”
“Tell me if what I feel is true.”
A burning bush?
Lightning?
A pillar of fire?
Something, anything to help interpret this confusing world.
All I have is an aching heart to follow.That same night, a knock came to my door.
It was a close friend. He cried on my shoulder.
He had asked the same question, but to his parents that night.
And in the arms of friendship and comfort, everything was better.12 years ago I found God. In the corner of my bedroom, weeping. “Will things be better?” he asked. “We’ll have broken hearts to mend and overthrow monsters of fear.” I said. And he just smiled.
M-
The following suggestions have been made for OutNotes links section:
http://www.webtool4free.com/gayforum
National Youth Advocacy Coalition
We’ve received some letters that aren’t actually “coming out” letters, so I’ll start to post them here in the news section. Here is the first:
Hi Mom,
It’s been 5 years almost to the day that I lost you, the hardest part about this is wondering if you hear and or see me from where you are. I can only hope you
can and know that I love you so deep and miss you everyday, but if you can hear my thoughts you already know that.My life this year has been very up and down, more downs then ups , my love life is pretty FLAT to say the least , this whole issue about learning to love
and trust again is very big and a hard personal issue to conquer. When I lost you I lost not only my best friend and mother but I lost my apart of my soul that
can’t be replaced.There are times I sit at night (which is usually the loneliest of times for me) thinking of you and the things we used to talk about, your advice was not really
considered at the time, but now I wish I would have listened to some of it, your wisdom was soulful, I have been threw so many changes in my life since I lost you and
a lot of confusion, I only wish that you where here to confide in.You know that I still can’t look at your picture yet without breaking down and crying a river of tears, I know this sounds so petty lame but, I feel lost and
secluded, but on the other hand I know that is my own fault for isolating myself for so long on an emotional& physical level.Mom I will end this with a poem.
Love and hate run hand and hand
When I think of you I think of the love I lost.
When I think of you I think of the hate for the man who caused this lose and wish him all pain at whatever cost.
Time can only mend the pain I feel they say, but for better or worse that day has not yet come and I still await that day.
The sun rises and falls for every new day and with each new day I pray and say to god “why me?” Why did I have to be left alone with this pain; it gives me
nothing to gain.Only the fondest of memories of you can warm my heart from this pain and for that I try to focus on and for that reason I know that this hate will eventually fade to
something of the past.Till then I will hold strong and stay in faith that this pain will end.
If I ever see you in heaven again know this to be true my love for you as my mother is very strong and will last forever last.
You’re Son
Darren
As mentioned the first of the press releases went out on Tuesday, and it went pretty well. The site had 3400 visits Tuesday with lots of visitors coming from Oh la la Paris (nsfw), kottge.org, and Yahoo! picks. I commented on some of the other links that we’ve come across. So far we have mainly gone after online & alternative press (mostly blogs), so we’ll see what the print & mainstream press thinks next. New letters are trickling in, no donations yet though.
Ways you can lend OutNotes a hand:
The first of the press releases are off (an edited version will be sent out more later), so we’ll see how that goes. OutNotes is one of the featured sites on the Yahoo! directory; I imagine that will bring big traffic when people start to wake up!
Here is the rough draft for the site launch press release, crticism and suggestions are welcome:
New Web Site Launched, OutNotes.com, a Place to Share ‘coming out’ Letters
A new resource for the gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transsexual communities launched yesterday. OutNotes.com consists of a collection of letters that people have written to friends, family, and loved ones to ‘come out.’ The site is already receiving letters of appreciation from people who have come out, and others who are still struggling to come out:
These letters brought tears to my eyes because I understand that these people are bearing their souls at the expense of everything they hold dear. I wish them all well and only hope that they have an easier time of it than I did.
OutNotes.com is beginning to grow in size; as letters have begin to pour in since yesterday’s launch. The letters vary considerably: from short and to the point, to heart-wrenchingly said, to humorous and witty.
Most people would never assume I am the way I am. You see me and I look all-american. I look like the girl next door, who’s gonna fall in love with Prince Charming and go on to start a family with one golden retriever and 2.5 children.
Well I am that girl. But I won’t be falling in love with Prince Charming. You see I’ve already fallen in love, with PrinceSS Charming. I’m a lesbian. I always have been.
The site also has a ‘news’ section for site related information and news from the GLBT community; allowing for further interaction with a comment enabled weblog style. The sites ‘about’ section sums up the purpose of the site, and points out the struggles that gay rights advocates face:
this site is about you. it is about your friends. it is about your family. it is about your loved ones. chances are you or someone you love has struggled with their sexuality. this site is about these people breaking out of the shackles of an oppressive society and reaching out to the ones they love. it is a collection of letters written in search of acceptance. if you have come out, are struggling to come out, or had someone come out to you; this site is about you. if you aren’t in any of these groups, chances are that someone is struggling with coming out to you or your community; and this site is about you.
gay rights are currently a major civil rights issue around the world. everyday gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgendered people struggle against a bigoted society. if the letters on this site can reach out to even one person and help them realize that these are real people looking for their acceptance, then it has succeeded. if it can give inspiration to one person who is struggling with their sexuality, then it has succeeded.
There is some great discussion over at mefi about the site.
These letters brought tears to my eyes because I understand that these people are bearing their souls at the expense of everything they hold dear. I wish them all well and only hope that they have an easier time of it than I did.
OutNotes has also allready been linked to from a number of other sites. I’ll add a coment with a link to each one I come across; please do the same if you find one.
I whipped up a couple little buttons; guess I’ll have to create a ‘promote’ page for the site, but they can live here for now. Feel free to create your own OutNotes buttons; let me know and I will add them to the site to share with everyone.
You can paste the following code into your site if you want to use one of these buttons:
<a href="http://outnotes.com/"> <img src="http://outnotes.com/outnotes-100×32.gif" border="0">< /a>
or
<a href="http://outnotes.com/"> <img src="http://outnotes.com/outnotescom-100×32.gif" border="0"> </a>
